I.. am going to somewhere far away.

Where the waters are azure and emerald. 

Where the sun shines golden, shimmering on the waves.

Where the wind will whip the white sand and the ocean spray will make my lips so salty.

Where I can be by myself, where I can bask in quiet and solitary peace. 

Where I will slow down. Where I will have no distractions to stay gold. I have been running, sprinting blindly for too long, making too many mistakes and destroying everything in my path..

I would want to lay in the sun, and fall asleep on the wooden floor boards, get a few new freckles, probably sing in the shower till late. 

In the morning, I would take off my sleepwear, and plunge right into the ocean. 

I will make friends with the fishes, turtles, and the sea stars. (Sharks!!)

I will look for what I lost, right there in myself. And I will let myself heal. 

It isn’t that hard, I do realize I have ridiculously much to be grateful for. 

Regret, longing, pain, loss. These will be my lessons, I won’t deny them in my world. they plant seeds in me, and they will grow into flowers when they are ready. 

I trust in this process. As I trust in love.